17 Tila Tequila Seriously Uncorked!

UPDATE 05/19/2011!

Back in August 2010, RadarOnline (the only crappy celebrity tabloid site that seems to give a flying fuck about this midget whore apparently) posted an article about an alleged sex tape Tila made with two female porn stars, Penthouse Pet Lia Leah and Vivid star Charlie Laine respectively:




Of course, panic-stricken her image will be threatened, goes on a blogging rampage, first accusing Garry Sun of spreading this rumor at RadarOnline and then trying to divert people's attention with this extortion crap between her and her ex-boyfriend, Francis Ten, which, strangely or coincidentally, occurred upon her lesbo tape fiasco. Why was Tila blogging about Francis Ten's extortion during those time is beyond me and it doesn't matter. No, wait. It isn't beyond me. I'll discuss about that in due time. What does matter is to try and put pieces together and see what kind of results we'll get: Was this lesbian sex tape really private or was it intentional? I prefer the latter and I have no doubt it was very intentional. I offer my thesis below. Enjoy.

First of all, why is Tila refusing to release her "real" sex tape that was recorded more than eight years ago according to her pit-bull lawyer, Alan Gutman, but was willing to film a lesbian porno instead? Could it be her tape was too short to meet Vivid Entertainment's standard? If so, then that's our answer. According to Da Nang hooker, claimed she was seventeen-years-old in that video, which I obviously don't buy and neither should you. Hell, that excuse was used by Carrie Prejean herself back in November 10, 2009! But that didn't stop Tila from pulling a Carrie Prejean stunt on August 4, 2010. Go figure. If, indeed, she was a minor in that video, then RadarOnline would have dismissed it for legal reasons and the photos would never surfaced...unless the whore decides to upload them herself and blame someone...oh, wait! She did! Francis Ten! I went back to that specific link and was surprised most of the photos are taken down, just two boring photos of Tila in her bikini, though. From the TMZ article, Tila's pit-bull lawyer states that video was made more than seven [eight] years ago, warning they're about to release a child pornographic video. Interestingly, RadarOnline states otherwise and wrote it was recorded in 2004. And back in 2004, Tila would either be 23 or 22...if she's telling the truth about her age.

Secondly, exactly what image is she striving for? If you Google her, you'll see nothing but nude photos of her. People who have followed her since Myspace debut are well aware of her sexually perverted behavior. As a matter of fact, this pretty old video, though screencapped, shows Tila rubbing her genitalia. Don't worry, the photo is censored for general viewing. Along with her perverted sexuality, she is known for lying and doing stupid antics to draw attention such as faking pregnancy, adopting, and suicide to name a few. If Tila is trying to re-invent herself, she will fail for her past will never disappear and people will know Miss Tila as a crazy, midget, lying Saigon whore that is known as Tila Tequila. Hey, Tila, changing names does not erase your past. People know your face, not your name. Consider yourself "damaged goods" and don't even bother striving for a good image. It ain't gonna happen.


Anyways, not surprisingly, the entry above, posted on August 4, 2010, can't be found on her site any longer. Dare I ask why? When RadarOnline published about her lesbian sex tape (not her past sex tape) for the first time, Tila not only didn't hesitate to divert its story, but quickly blamed Garry Sun, her previous unpaid employee, and got him pushed under the bus like many of her previous relationships with men, be it professional or personal. ^{[1] [2] [3] [4] [5]} It was a wise thing of her to remove that entry as she'd accused poor Garry Sun of cutting her arm and coerced to kill her if she told "the truth". Such allegations could have gotten her into trouble and therefore, omitted the entry. Tsk, tsk. I've saved it, Tila. Your lies don't vanish.

Kinda like a grieving process, it took her a while to finally talk about her lesbian sex tape. If you'd noticed, she first pointed fingers at Garry Sun, then brought up this extortion perpetuated by her ex boyfriend, and then finally accepted the truth that she indeed made a sex tape, and recently. By the way, as much as I hate to admit this, but I actually failed to notice Tila really didn't deny about her lesbian sex tape at all, it's just that she was diverting and I was frolicking too much to think clearly at that time. However, took her a while to confront about the tape, though. So much for having tough skin, right Tila?


I guess she'd changed her mind or she was really, really desperate to stay noticed.



This entry was posted September 29, 2010 and you'll notice Tila is changing her story and blaming an unnamed person for extortion. I guess Garry Sun is off the hook...for now. "I just want to let everyone know that this is the worst thing that could happen to anyone!" Um, what? And it gets better. We have literally an endless entries of Tila committing exploitations on people. So, it's okay if she exploits them, but it's not okay to exploit her? Yeah, whatever. The world doesn't work that way, Tila.

Tila's personal entry was posted on October 4, 2010 and reveals who is the extortionist of this situation. Well, sorry you got an asshole involved in your shitty life, but what the hell does this have to do with your lesbian sex tape? I've seen only one picture of her ex, but yet to hear from his point of view via video interview, not that it would convince me otherwise that this whole thing is legit, but either way, please feel free to stand me corrected. Until then, something doesn't quite fit in with the picture I'm trying to put together. And until then, Tila won her case and got her tape back, a tape that's worth a penny. Whoopie-doo.

Fast forward to February 2011. Valentine's Day is approaching and Vivid Entertainment is releasing her lesbian sex tape near that holiday. Unfortunately on their part, a party has uploaded a five-minute clip of her porno and pushed Vivid to release the sex tape even earlier to keep it fresh:

Who is really telling the truth about the date? First, the whore says it was taken years ago. Why does it sound like she's trying to empathize "years ago?" as if it was really filmed in 2004? Then, within the next few paragraphs, says it was made nearly two years ago, which is more believable, but not true at all. So, which is it? I believe it was filmed between May and July of 2010. From this article, which was posted on August 10, 2010, it states it was filmed about a month ago. Well, obviously July, June, and May were the last months, right? Two ways to find out: How did she looked around that time and did she have scars on her arm? The second I can't prove as I don't have her porn video, but the first, well, the looks shouldn't be uncanny:

Interesting. Tila looks the same: old-looking with the same hair-do. If you have seen the entire video, did you see any scars on her arm? That would be the biggest evidence that it was filmed very recently and not even a fucking year ago as she wants us to believe.

UPDATE:
Thanks to Monique for the photos! We now have evidence that Tila Tequila Uncorked was filmed sometime in July, or maybe late June of 2010:

We can see the Inception movie poster that was released at U.S. theaters on July 16th, 2010. So, obviously her tape couldn't been filmed more than two years ago, but if you're truly an idiot and still in denial like this moron, what about the scars you can see on Tila's arm?

Poor Tila was very lonely and felt ignored by the media and did what she could do to draw attention: Cut herself, which occurred in early June 2010.

And now, the conclusion with a special treat at the end! After researching and putting the puzzles together, it's pretty obvious this was intentionally to be shown. Here are the biggest give away: What a coincidence that the two other ladies are porn stars and not of a private citizen who likely would say fuck no and prevent Tila from releasing their sex tape and her excuses just being unbelievable. Not to mention, if Tila indeed wanted to keep her tape from reaching adult stores, then why the hell is she promoting her tape then? Because it was a self-defeat? How could it be a defeat if it was done deliberately? No way in hell this was a private video. Tila has a habit of bragging about being in relationships. Keep in mind that she was dating Casey Johnson no more than a month and not once had Tila mentioned about dating one of those porn stars.

So, why did this moron lose this time?

What does she have to say about this?

So, Tila lost because she refused to fork him over one million dollars? If you check out those retweets under liar liar, there's a chock full of tweets about Tila bragging about having lots of dough, and lots of it. So, let's say she's rich, what's the problem here? Surely she can get that lost money back...right? I hope we're on the same page here about Tila not really rich as she wants us to believe. Anyways, that one million dollar is fake. No A-List celebrity had to pay that much to get their sex tape back (at least to my knowledge) and with some bottom-feeder nobody like Miss Tila herself, would be hard to fathom that was the requested money. The truth is, Tila never intended to fight back. It was just a publicity stunt to dupe and persuade perverted folks to buy her god awful tape and from according to the CEO of Vivid, says the sales are doing great. So, what do you think? Pseudo private sex tape or real private sex tape?

And now, for a special bonus!

This is so strange and I swear I never saw it coming! Okay, two things I hate to admit, but will admit: 1, yes, I did once tried to locate that hotel where the trios did their dirty things and how I discovered that location was certainly a big ass surprise, too. 2, You all know I despise Paris Hilton, right? Well, I would stop by her twitter page, by arbitrary of course, but usually when I'm extremely bored, and this spoiled rat tweeted about staying at *drum roll* W Hollywood hotel! I love hotels and couldn't resist checking it out and while going through their photos, I've stumbled onto the picture of their bathrooms and I said to myself: Why does that place look so familiar? So, I Googled Tila Tequila Uncorked and found satisfying photos of the interior designs of their room and guess what? It matched with the West Hollywood hotel.

Since I don't own Tila Tequila Uncorked, I don't know whether or not it discloses its filming location and if so, why haven't we taunted her about how she spread her disease there? So, I'm assuming most people don't know its location...until now. When choosing a hotel in Hollywood, avoid West Hollywood hotel at all cost or bring your febreze...lots of them!