Friday, December 31, 2010

31 2010 Rewind: Tila's Biggest Failure

Tomorrow will be a new year and with that, I anticipate more failure coming from our favorite mogul besides sucking lots of dicks for more cash (cause, ya know, she's a prostitute) for 2011! It's like, I can't hardly wait!

So, what do you think was Tila's biggest failure for 2010? Here's my list:

1. Celebrity gossip blog
2.) Tila's Iphone apps
3. Tila Merch

Well, happy new year and I hope the whore will continue to act more stupid than ever to remain relevant!

Friday, December 24, 2010

18 Happy Holidays!

Wednesday, December 22, 2010

25 Hooking Up With Tila Tequila Book Review

I like to thank MissTilaOMG (not the real Tila Tequila), for sharing us this link:

By Jef Otte, Thu., Nov. 11 2010

Perhaps more than ever in this reality show age we live in, it can be difficult to know what the hell famous people are even famous for -- and nobody, besides maybe Paris Hilton, exemplifies that "famous for being famous" phenomenon better than Tila Tequila. In her completely un-clamored-for memoir, Tequila's main mission seems to be to justify that fame; though the official subtitle is A Guide to Love, Fame, Happiness, Success and Being the Life of the Party, it might as well be I don't care what you think of me, but it really bugs me that that's what you think of me.

Monday, December 20, 2010

7 Tila Tequila, Got Your Feelings Hurt From Online?


Found this, but can't find its origin, though.

14 Dear Tila, Stop Impersonating

Dear Skank,

Please stop impersonating as the haters, thank you. For someone who constantly call haters stalkers, it sure doesn't make any sense of welcoming them back. Do you even know what a "stalker" is?

Monday, December 13, 2010

40 Sorry, TilaArmy, But Haters Are Too Important

Desperate times call for desperate measures, right Tila? Despite the fans' plea, the wicked witch made the decision based on volition rather than vote to allow haters back...all for the sake of site traffic, which is a total fail *coughs celebrity gossip blog coughs*. Apparently, the skank wasn't too thrilled about her site analysis. I'm sure those online ventures, who are paying for ad space, aren't too thrilled themselves, so what's a nasty slut got to do? Bring back the haters!!!!!! Screw you, fans! Wow. Tila basically spit on them again and they still act she's innocent!

Sunday, December 12, 2010

36 A Chat with a Tila Army Soldier!

Okay, this was both interesting and agonizing at the same time. It was agonizing because I had to diminish my I.Q. and pretend to be one of Tila Army fans, so I had to do some pseudo ass-kissing! Yes, the horror! I was on Twitter and checked the Tila Army search page and some fan posted a link to her tinychat page. Since I was bored, I decided to chat with a fan to see how her brain functions and well, you decide. I randomly picked a name of Lili. Damn. I kinda messed up on my url at the end but whatever. I swear to God, she was not reading my messages and was dodging important questions. So Tila, right? Anyways, there are some little humor (or least I think so) here and there. ENJOY!

Saturday, December 11, 2010

6 A Tumbleweed In The Wind

This was done out of request. In the height of recent event, Tila had comments set on approval and taunted the haters of losing their privileges to have fun with this whore and thus, effected her site traffic...pretty drastically. The evidence speaks for itself, folks. Thanks to Tila for helping prove our case! Of course, the skank will disagree cause her ego is bigger than those fake wonky titties of hers, but when evidence is shown, her sentiments don't mean shit.

Friday, December 10, 2010

22 A Victory Without a Start?

Hello, everybody! Not so long ago, Tila tweeted the possibility of allowing haters to return only on the condition that they behave. That's like telling the sun to not shine at all. Is this stupid ugly bitch that retarded? I'm sure they'll be more aggressive and resume posting her new home address. Oh, noes! Tila, you better filter some numbers and street signs, girl!

Sunday, December 5, 2010

55 Yes, This Is So Shocking!



Tila, you certainly have a fucked up mind. I'm just say'n. Moving on. The entry is about Tila "shocked" about some blogger, who have a history of being mean to her (according to her statement), finally wrote what she considers a "shocking, interesting" message. I guess this moron is very easy to please. Granted, the blogger didn't lash out at her but, the entry itself contains one fucking paragraph and already this whore is drooling like a dog and overreacted.

Saturday, December 4, 2010

37 General Chat: What's On Yo Mind?

So, while our little embarrassed, hater-obsessed tyranny boss slash mogul slash bitch slash whore slash hooker and etc is recouping, I think this would be a pleasant time to get to know each other and share our interests. This entry will also be a place to discuss about Tila herself as well. All I ask is that we keep the conversations spam free and general friendly. We are more civilized and mature than this twit and her naive minions. Also, depending on the comment count, it will be necessary to create a new entry and close the other because it would suck to keep scrolling down. I hope that's cool with you guys. That said, shoot away!

P.S. for the haters who haven't gotten the memo, please read Dear Visitors: A Proposal and participate in this plan!

Friday, December 3, 2010

21 Haters Are Now Officially Banned! Wah!

I guess our little angel of God is still angry at us. Gee, I thought for someone who claims to be all grown-up would be mature enough to handle this drama like an reasonable adult, guess not. So much for spreading positive energy.

Taste your own medicine, you sore loser.

Thursday, December 2, 2010

44 Dear Visitors: A Proposal

A reader, Joann, requested I should share this idea with you guys. This idea had been suggested before as a matter of fact but the lack of attempt got an inclusive result, so it doesn't hurt to try this time. If this proposal succeeds, it would have a devastating effect on our poor Tila Tequila, but most importantly, devastate her ad revenue and site traffic, which is part of her income since she doesn't have a full-time job (unless she's still hooking quietly).

Without haters, Tila would be more less than what she is today, whatever the fuck that is. There are more haters and it is the haters who are the fuels to her demanding needs for attention and the incentive to remain alive. If haters go away, her site will practically be dead because the lack of fanbase. If that wasn't true, then what's with these overwhelming negative comments and thumb downs? Surely Tila and her fans wouldn't pretend to be us to help proof their case that we're all psychos (does voodoo ring any bell?), right? I mean, let's face it, who's more of a psycho by cutting their arms, seducing minors, and proclaiming to save us all from evil as oppose to leaving negative feedbacks?

Wednesday, December 1, 2010

25 Dear Tila, Suck It, You Bitch!

Well, well, well. Tila certainly got served, didn't she? Bitch is mad as hell. But don't worry, she'll be bubbly and oblivious within few hours. See?
This was posted after the haters party, or more politically correct, when someone disclosed her home address and it spread like fire. Honestly, I don't think that was right, but there's nothing we can do now. The damage has been done. Anyone can find each other if they wanted too, so bitch shouldn't get too riled up, but we're talking Tila, here. She's a paranoid mentally ill woman who thinks the world is out to get her. Please.

Tuesday, November 30, 2010

23 Tila's Mansion!

ATTENTION: Please do not share Tila's new home address on this site for policy and security reasons. Anyone do, and your comment will be deleted! Thank you. Carry on!

For God's sake, don't watch this clip with your speakers on! I had to endure it for obvious reasons. Want to know how a narcissist behaves? Well, now's your chance. As a narcissist, you must be in your lingerie while giving your underage fans a tour. You must discuss about your stockings and your lingerie, but most importantly, must talk in front of a mirror, forgetting to realize the viewer is interested about the new home than the midget skank before their eyes. In other words, can this skank ever show us a clip without her face literally right on our monitors? I'm just say'n.

I think Tila was consuming energy drinks with um, pills today (I'll discuss about that too) and hence, was under the influence because she not only rant about the tiniest things around the house (mainly the lights, thinking they're part of alien ships probably), but sang random shit and yap with a British accent spontaneously here and there. I think that was pretty weird. Her singing is god awful. It reminds of me of those crazy people who sings and rants loudly on trains. And Tila, stop playing that goddamn tune and compose new ones already. Jesus Christ.

8 Tila's True Color towards TilaArmy


Once a bitch, always a bitch.

For someone who is still below a "z list" category, and hardly respected, sure likes to fuck with her fans. If stupid people did not exist, Tila would certainly not be where she's now. Dead, I can imagine. I'm sure this twit treated her idiotic, easily influenced, fans like shit since she hit the dead Myspace page, but I rather bring up her latest insults instead. Ever since Tila announced she's pregnant, she referred herself as "Mama T" and a "mogul". What's wrong with these names? She is neither. It's like referring myself as a Caucasian when I'm not. Although she no longer refers herself as a "mogul" (gee, I wonder why?), but to this day, has a passion of naming herself as "Mama T" which is subtly her way of insulting those who suffered miscarriages and the orphans.

Monday, November 29, 2010

8 Tila Found New Love! No, It's Not Onyx

Wedding bells ringing, rose petals falling, people cheering, and us fearing...

Wednesday, November 24, 2010

14 Tila Denied and Still in Denial

So, our mogul skank attended American Music Awards After Party, doing her best to sound she's among the important standard show-up celebrity list, but according to TheWrap.com, was denied VIP entrance instead!

Thursday, November 18, 2010

33 What Vogue? Database011010 is Tila!

Back in November 12th, Tila announced she was going to be in Italian's version of Vogue magazine:
This morning, Tila shared us her narcissistic excitement about being "featured" in some magazine called The Source, a magazine, which, I've never heard of until now. If you're wondering about the Italian Vogue project, consider that as a big typo on Tila's behalf. However, it is also plausible regardless as Vogue magazines are monthly released; but that is not to say she can't share us a preview, right? Vogue magazines are known to have gaunt and tall models. Why in the world would they accept this midget whore if she's not even five feet tall? Hell, this skank is not respected in most media outlets (unless they're trash where she's welcomed), but instead, a joke like William Hung from American Idol. Passing amusements, right?

Sunday, November 14, 2010

14 Walking On Fried Rice

Bella Honey Soul posted a brief article of Tila's upcoming musical porn video called "Walking on Thin Ice" composed and performed by Yoko Ono, and judging by the photos we've seen, it looks like a knife and stabbing will be involved!

God damn, Tila Tequila looks really awful. That Asian upper eyelid surgery apparently did not go well or it's still in healing process.  Sad.

8 Do You Think Tila Played a Role in Johnson's Death?

A commentator, N Poko, from the Tilasrotspot, provided an interesting entry posted by Blonde Blogger regarding about Casey Johnson's death. It is really interesting and should be read and I want to help spread it. Click here to read the entry, otherwise, proceed on.

Saturday, November 13, 2010

10 This Is How A Dumbass Loser Thinks

UPDATE AT BOTTOM

This is the best news? wtf? Just like having your sex tape is the worst thing that could happen to anybody as well, right bitch?

As we all know by now, Garry Sun was unfortunately late for a court hearing which ultimately granted this whore a three-year restraining order, plus one hundred yards instead of ten this time, all because he was late. Honestly, as much as I want this ugly nasty bitch to go down (I don't mean hands and knees) or put in jail (even better), I didn't have confidence in Garry Sun when he failed to prove otherwise and suspected he would lose had he shown up. A letter means nothing.

Friday, November 12, 2010

13 It's All About Me, Me, Me, Me


Hmmmmm...really, Tila?

YOU FAILED, Thien Thanh Thi Nguyen!

What? No photos of your new mansion and blogged this crap instead?

Tuesday, November 9, 2010

24 Poor, Poor Tila and Other Shitfest

Wow. How dumb can you be and never anticipate some hater would take the time off rummaging through your old garbage, Titla? You know, there's that beautiful saying: One man's garbage is another man's treasure. That's what I love about Tila's archives. She tries so hard to delete files or hopes no one would figure out the real truth behind the words she say or the words she types. Her AOI constantly falls for her bullshit. Why is that? Sure, they're idiots, but I think there's a deeper reason we're so dying to know. I consider this a phenomenon that deserves to be studied. If someone constantly lies to you and it's blatant, a normal human being would confront the liar or find a better person. But not Tila Army. I speculate with others that perhaps Tila's fans are psychologically messed up and suffer low self-esteem. Other possibility is Tila creating fake accounts to deceive the general public of having a large fanbase, when in reality, have few and most are underage.

Monday, November 8, 2010

8 Tila's Pee-Wee House #2

When I'd finished reading Tila's latest entry regarding about her new mansion, I felt a déjà vu all over again. I recommend you read her old entry about moving away back in February of this year:

Tuesday, November 2, 2010

4 I Have Real Vampire Fangs!

I've always assumed, at the age of an adult, you know, like thirty, that stupidity was meant for Paris "Skanky" Hilton, but I guess stupidity does not discriminate age. I think this is one of the most agonizing entry I'd ever read to date. The way she described her Halloween day was just so...ineffable. Best words to describe how I felt was imagine someone telling you a story, but adding an excessive amount of unnecessary details. What contributed to this painful reading was her lack of basic writing style...or should I say, blogging? Anyone with a common sense know real vampire fangs don't exist, so my guess is she's intentionally fabricating crazy dumb shit in order to keep the haters and bloggers discussing about her. Whatever floats her boat because I enjoy insulting her.

Sunday, October 31, 2010

15 Her New Pee-Wee House Update

Here's another proof that Tila is a one big (despite her actual size) piece of shit who truly believes she suffered the most! *gasp*
Bitch, unless this dumbass sad shit Tila Army soldier of yours told you her entire life story, you better shut it about suffering. Do you have a roof over your head? Do you have enough food to eat? Do you drive a Lambo? Did you traveled to the UK? Did you recently ate at Mr. Chow? Do you even have a little fanbase? If you said yes to all these, then shut your disgusting fucking mouth and rather than feeling sorry for yourself, go to Africa and Uganda to help wells instead of using people's misery for your pathetic advantage. Sick slut should get kidnapped and beaten up is what you need because your Daddy wasn't the man enough to make you suffer the same fate as Casey Johnson's in your earlier days!

Friday, October 29, 2010

8 Lunatic, Mentally Unstable Garry Sun Gets a Restraining Order

Wow. Lunatic? Mentally unstable? A loony? Danger to the society? Tila, you've finally admit it you're all those! Oh, shit. You're talking about Garry Sun. My bad. Someone please buy this whore a mirror. Broken or not, a fucking mirror please. And where's our gratitude about being skeptic as well? Some skank you are.

Wednesday, October 27, 2010

11 Both of You Shut the Fuck Up

UPDATE 10/29/2010

I've always assumed this is just another publicity stunt, but after watching Garry Sun's video (thanks to Joann for the link!), I may change my mind. Garry is trying to persuade the world Tila not only kidnapped someone, but is also responsible for Casey Johnson's death. Now, I can't think of any haters out there not ponder if this monster played any role, so I wouldn't be surprised if Tila is found guilty. Hell, even I still think this whore had some responsibility. However, the big difference is, it is strictly an opinion of ours, but he insist of knowing the truth and said this:


Tuesday, October 26, 2010

18 Cheap Fashion Slut, Plus, Post Birthday Party Bash

UPDATE! Thanks for the wonderful haters!

I can't wait until this whore dies. Where is Jane when we need her?

So, Tila went to Mr. Chow restaurant on her birthday (as opposed to going to Egypt), a place where many celebrities actually go to and believes Jame Franco was there for the purpose of her small party. Thankfully, he got out of there just in time because the skank showed up "two hours" late and had not infected him with whatever disease the whore has. Her little party went swell. What more could a person ask for to complete your birthday party when you have other untalented hated famewhores like Michael Lohan and Kate Major (whom I've never heard of until now) there to celebrate with you? It's like, I'm so jealous!.........NOT.

Monday, October 25, 2010

15 Tila Merch Ideas!

Awwwwww..her birthday is officially over. I hope the hag finally finished her crocodile tears by now and is having fun in Egypt with her friends, and at the same time, moving in her new three-floor mansion! Who knew she was omnipresent? Why couldn't this skank find a better photo of herself than this piece of scary garbage? It literally has the word, "psycho" all over the pic!

Saturday, October 23, 2010

7 Let Us Welcome Tila's New Guest Blogger

Tila doesn't find other people fucking attractive if they're not her or skanky at all. On October 18th, this retard tweeted this:
Excuse us, but the world does not want to see your saggy blue waffle cooch or your wonky tits. You're not young anymore. Get over it, hoe.

Friday, October 22, 2010

19 Tila's Home Advent

Sometimes, while hunting down Tila's past lies, I often find irrelevant subjects quite interesting and post worthy along the way. Tila Tequila has been scrutinized about her unhealthy superficial relationship toward Tila Army and has a reputation of being called a pedophile. Is she really one, though? Take a look at these and you decide:

15 Help Tila Army Make a Stupid B-Day Present Video!

Thanks to RockitQueen for the birthday link!

So, Tila has been rubbing our faces about her approaching 38th birthday. Because the video was (and still is) such a laugh riot, I believe it deserves its own entry. Don't worry. I still haven't forgotten about Tila's three-floor manison advent! This space cadet goes by the name of ParalzyedQueen, who was chosen as the Tila Army of the Week, one time, for providing so much ass-kissing support (what an accomplishment!). And it gets better. This scary soldier obeyed Tila's command by attacking Perez Hilton as well. SMH. And Tila strives for positive energy? Am I missing something here? I wonder if the Tila Army will rob a bank if Tila asked them too, or worse, kill someone. Hey, it happened with the Manson Family.

Thursday, October 21, 2010

11 Tila Merch! Opening Never!

8 So Much Catching Up To Do!

Hello, everybody! Sorry for being away. Now that I'm back, I have so much catching up to do. First off, I want to thank for those who played my sample Dress Up Tila Flash Game. I do not know when the final project will be completed, but it will take some time. I tend to make the stage a little bigger, that way, it will feel less cluttered. Unfortunately, because I'm very new with Adobe Flash CS4, I do not know actionscripts at all and don't know how to create better mouse controls. Here's a tip, though: When you drag an object, simply double click to release instead once. Works for me. Getting Titla Bacteria to roll on the floor would be awesome, but it takes a lot of animation, plus actionscripts, to do that and I simply don't have that much of an effort to attempt at this point. And yes, that is a monocle. I put it there because I truly love them. It has nothing to do with Tila's intelligence; for she has none. If you ask me, I think she has a learning disability besides suffering from mental disorders. She's such an ugly freak. And I fucking mean that.

Friday, October 15, 2010

15 Dress Up Tila Sample Flash Game!

Hello, everybody. This project is going smoothly and I'm happy to announce I've uploaded a sample of my game for you guys to play! Now, I'm sure there are folks out there who might find this childish, but let me tell you something: Everything about Tila is childish, so this is an exception! Dress ups are fun! That said, please keep in mind this is only a sample and I don't have a lot of funny stuff created yet. So, in the meantime, play around with it, offer feedback and send requests if you have any.

Oh, I also want to mention about my reset button. It's been omitted for this one because of one mistake. I didn't check the limited size from megaswf website. My file exceeded over the limit, so I had to make a new file and convey most of the stuff to the new one, hence, messing up my reset configuration and as you can see, I have a lot of shit on there and I don't feel like fixing the x and y attributions. Well, enough talk. Enjoy!

Help Tila pick an outfit for her next charity event, which involves building wells!

Wednesday, October 13, 2010

17 I'm Too Focused On Myself!

What was expected to be a "private sexual seduction", turns out to be another narcissistic act of Tila making weird, but scary facial expressions from her "glamroom". A nineteen seconds of life I'll never get back sadly. Nothing new, even I wouldn't recommend you watching it.

3 Tila Declares Her Own Holiday: Free Hugs Day!

Yes, you've read that right, folks. Titla Bacteria decides to declare her own little holiday, a free hugs day, incorporated on October 13th, 2010, but we all know free hugs been around for a long time, right? My version of the story? She went to a local sex store and on her way back to her rented Lambo, saw three horny young men with "free hugs" signs and felt heart-broken when no one was hugging them. I don't know about you guys, but I do not feel comfortable hugging random people. So, the filthy coquette interferes by asking how many hugs they've received and their answers? Too many. "Can I take a picture with you guys?" Her question aroused suspicion, and since they're determined to accomplish their mission, said yes to get her out of there quickly as possible.

Tuesday, October 12, 2010

15 Jayden's Angel!!!! When Will it Be Legit?


Tila, it is October 12, and I'm still eager to write a fabulous review of your recent trip to Africa and Uganda.......*someone taps me on my shoulder* Oh, my bad. I just realized you have yet to do so. What a sack of shit you really are. Savor every moment of giggling and eating meals because for the next two years, you better make your shitty life worth every second. You tweeted yourself that you're going to die by then. Well, I'm not holding my breath, but this whore sure likes to make fun of people's grief. Miscarriage, adoption, charity fraud. Speaking of charity fraud, hey, Tila, why isn't your Jayden's Angels legit?! How does it feel to steal from your own fans? It's truly an insult of you to show up at charity "dinner" events when you lied about Jayden's Angels being legit and decided to keep the money that was meant to go for your own fake ass organization instead! Funny, when one organization isn't legit, your last thought is to donate anyways. I hope the guests held onto their belongings when you passed by them. I know I would...and have a can of mace for extra security with me.

Sunday, October 10, 2010

18 Photos of Tila's Sex Tape

RadarOnline has published few photos of Tila's sex tape, which was recorded several years ago. Poor Tila: "I will never make a sex tape." She's been awfully quiet now. I'm sure she's speaking with her twelve lawyers for whatever reasons. What a joke! BTW, her boobs actually looks better in those photos, now they're just nasty as hell.

Friday, October 8, 2010

8 Coming Soon! A Flash Interactive Game: Dress Up Tila Tequila!

Hello, everybody! I am quite excited! I've been thinking about this project for quite a long time and being persistent, finally found what I needed to accomplish this! I'm gonna create a digital paper doll where we'll all get to dress up Tila!

Here's the scoop! Tila Tequila has been personally invited to attend another charity event, an event where she's required to build wells, so she needs our help! With outfits, plus make-up and accessories available to us, compliments of Tila Tequila herself obviously, it is our goal to make the final decision! Will the clothes be appropriate, decent, classy, or slutty?

On the downside, we'll have to wait a while. I don't know how long this will take. If you have any suggestions on clothing and accessories for me to add, then please provide an image hosted on imageshack, photobucket or other image hosting site as I don't want to scan through a webpage just to look for the particular outfit. The higher the resolution, the better details.

Oh, and for those who still haven't seen my other flash video of Loni VS Tila, click here to view it.

15 Feature Feedback Requested

Hello, all. While I'm not trying to clutter this blog with too much widgets and gadgets, but I need to know if the current features of Top Commentators at the top left side and the post count with the tiny username icon on the right side of each subject titles works. Can you see them with your browser? I appreciate your time to answer my question!

UPDATE: When I installed rate star, the code wasn't shown and have removed the entire widget. Hmmmm...I can see it on my site now. Strange...can you see the rate stars? Am I seeing stars myself? o.0

Thursday, October 7, 2010

15 Judge says Fuck Off, Pumping Gas, and More Charity

Wednesday, October 6, 2010

5 I Am So Excited To Be "Apart" of This Charity!



Already this whore thinks she's doing good for the mankind. She'd already labeled herself as a humanitarian. According to dictionary.com:


Monday, October 4, 2010

2 Sex Tape, Something Special? What's the Difference?



Sometimes, reading is way better than watching videos! Tila is still (acting) pissed off about her sex tape of possibly been released to the public. As previously discussed, there was another important factor I've failed to mention, but thanks to the wonderful haters for pointing out things I often overlook!

For one, if Tila is serious about her past boyfriend (or client) of extorting her, lawyers would demand their clients to shut the hell up while working on the case. However, because Tila is running her mouth off, chances are, her past boyfriend is not extorting her. Secondly, she discloses this "tragic" news to RadarOnline first instead on her own blog. So, this tells us extortion does not exist, but a mere publicity stunt to help promote her pornographic film and make few bucks from a tabloid site. Remember the Juggalos? She disclosed the photos to TMZ instead on her blog.

That being said, Tila has now confirmed that she indeed made a sex tape. However, as predicted, she tried to make it sound like her sex tape isn't just a sex tape, but something very special. Here are my favorite outlines from her constant-lip smacking video:

2 Girl is Pissed About the Possible Release of Her Sex Tape!

I want to thank Tila for entertaining us! Damn girl, you're just too funny! Anyways, confirmed by her co-stars, Penthouse Pet Lia Leah and Vivid star Charlie Laine, that Tila Tequila shot a pornographic film with them, strangely enough, Tila Tequila is more disturbed and riled up about her sex tape apparently recorded by then her no-name (surprised?) boyfriend from the past because, who knew there's such a big difference between a homemade sex and porn tapes! In this case, it was wise of her to not mention his name for obvious reasons, however, I think it's very strange Tila's sex tape fiasco is going rampant and girl just can't stop talking about it. My guess like most people: Tila's desperate attempt to promote her new adult film so it wouldn't become a flop and sick people will buy it. Actually, I like porn myself, but you have to be really sick wanting to see this nasty whore fuck on camera who fucked so many people in the past and present. 300 hundred pages sounds right. Can you imagine what her vagina looks like by now? Gross!

So, if this is just a publicity stunt, does that mean there is no Tila Tequila sex tape? Well, not to fully disappoint the perverts out there, I'll be kind enough to share you what I've collected. Hmmmmm...I wonder if this makes me a pervert? And while they're not literally porn, you might as well call it soft-porn. Don't worry, I marked over her wonky tits and other necessary assets to make this blog still general audience friendly (sort of).

Saturday, October 2, 2010

3 I Am a Nice Person with Happy Feelings!

The subject title is taken by a quote from Kung Pow: Enter the Fist's antagonist, Master Pain (aka Evil Betty). I use this quote to describe Tila's desperate attempt to transit from being a drug-addict manipulative hooker with no common sense to grown-up mature lovely woman destined to help those in need. *snorts loudly*

Tila haven't done actual shit and let me make it fucking clear she can try to become the next Mother Teresa all she wants, but she will NEVER earn my respect, nor will I ever apologize for pissing her off! To boast and label yourself as the "hero of the week" says a lot about you: You're a fucking idiot and helping for the wrong reasons! Desperate to win everyone's approval and start liking her is her main goal. People who participate don't brag about helping others. Due to the fact of overwhelming skepticism, I guess I can't blame her for wanting to prove us wrong. However, two things comes to my mind: One, anyone can donate to charities, and two, Tila should just keep her fucking meth-mouth shut and let the organizations speak for themselves and express gratitude when ready. Otherwise, announcing charity after charity is a sign of desperation and lack of genuine desire to help.

Right now, Titla Bacteria is all hyped up about charities...just like how she was all hyped up about her celebrity gossip site and within four months, didn't like blogging:

Wednesday, September 29, 2010

3 What If Loni Love & Tila Got Into a Physical Fight?

Okay, well, apparently I can't embed the file, so just click here to see the hilarious flash video I made of what would have happened if Loni and Tila got into a fight...physically, not verbally. Well, here's my perspective. Enjoy!

Tuesday, September 28, 2010

4 Tila On Gossip Queens

I want to give a big thanks to lolercopter69 for the link!



How many "first of all" can you count? Jesus Christ, man. Nothing interesting except Tila trying to milk sympathy about her Juggalos aftermath (because she just can't let it go) and had the nerve to explicitly point out one of her scars to empathize how traumatic it was. When asked why she didn't get off the stage, Tila's answer doesn't shock me. In fact, her answer embarrassed me: "First of all *long pause* I'm gangsta!"

Really, Tila? So, if you're such a gangsta, then why the fuck are you still talking about your damned scars and vent on suing The Juggalos which, not surprisingly, dropped the charges later on. It was dropped because she knew she would lose due to the fact she was warned numerous times, was told she can keep the money and run, and refused to get off the stage. I'm sure her attorney told her to go fuck herself and hung up.

I lol'ed when Tila said, "I was in Las Vegas, hosting blah blah blah" HAHAHAAHAAHAAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!! Whore couldn't just say, "I was in Las Vegas, hosting a grand opening of a strip club." Wow. She is obviously too embarrassed to say it! The Gossip Queens were like, "um...blah blah blah?" That was funny! Oh, Tila, Tila. God damn, you fucking suck!

Sunday, September 26, 2010

4 Hey, Everybody! Look At Me!

I love how Grandma Tila is striving to look like Gia Marie Carangi. Here's an overrated American actress, Angelina Jolie, portraying as the model from the movie, Gia:

Anything filmed from Hollywood is equivalent to wikipedia. They like to exaggerate things and have false trivia intact in order to sell shit. So, from the film, Gia was a young rebellious bisexual woman who lived on a fast lane, and drugs was what killed her. Also in the movie, Gia was a foul-mouth young woman with an aggressive attitude but was rather seductive those around her. Hmmmm...could it be our aspiring mogul whore Tila wants to be exactly like her? Perhaps it's for the best: No damage, harm will take place from those around her if she's gone. Will fate be kind enough and instead make her disappear forever and worked as a prostitute until demise? Tila's cult of Tila Army is quite frightening and God knows what can happen if it continues. Anyways, Tila, you are not Gia. This is actually you:


Saturday, September 25, 2010

4 Will Tila Die on Thursday, August 16, 2012?

So, while Grandma Tila is on another vacation (*violent cough* even though she doesn't have a job and made a recent appearance on the Logo channel), and out of boredom, decided to resume going through her old tweets hosted by celebritytweets.com. I'll say it again: I find that website actually useful. However, I am not too fond of her old gangsta tweets archived with an url name of "celebrity" because, face it folks, this bitch ain't no celebrity. She's just an infamous over-charging whore; an ugly-looking one, that is.

Anyways, with patience, you'll eventually find some crazy Tila tweets I'm sure she herself have already forgotten. Right, Tila?

Tuesday, September 21, 2010

7 Truly Stupid or Done Intentionally? I Choose the Latter

Okay, so most of you know by now that Tila flipped one of her images and was caught. Refer to my previous post. While us, haters, are having fun ridiculing her about this, I, on the other hand, is very skeptic and believes this was done intentionally.



I got really confused about this discovery. Tila wants us to believe she lives in a two-floor house with two kitchens because, after all, she considers herself a "mogul" and runs her own "empire." Not to mention, she once gave us a tour, only to be in her "glamroom" (bathroom) the entire time. Some tour, bitch. Most of the photos and videos of Tila at her apartment are either shot in her bedroom or from her bathroom, rambling shit while being high. And when in her bedroom though, I don't ever see that Marilyn picture.

Sunday, September 19, 2010

3 Black Makes a Difference with Piano Keys!

Why the hell can't this ugly bitch ever stop talking about her scars for once? Had she not mentioned them, no one would fucking notice! Nice to know Tila is a on a vacation and is yet, busy tweeting away and interacting with her underage fans and haters as if she's really not. The truth is, she has been on a vacation for long ass time because she doesn't have a fucking job.



Saturday, September 18, 2010

3 Hi, Welcome Back!



Hi, welcome back, whore. I guess your month break is officially over.

Thursday, September 16, 2010

1 Mr. Bradshaw No More and Tila Gone For a Month?!

Hello, folks! I've got some entertaining stuff here that are likely to tickle your funny bones out there!

First off. Could it be true that Tila let Mr.Bradshaw go?! This comment post can be found at Tila's DEAR DIARY: MISS TILA IS TAKING TIME OFF TO GET AWAY FROM EVERYTHING! entry if it haven't been deleted yet:

I love how Tila thinks she's so fucking famous and far superior than Lindsay Lohan! What a nutcase!

Friday, September 10, 2010

4 Oh, Tila, You're Just as Guilty, You Stupid Whore!

ANOTHER UPDATE AT THE BOTTOM!

I'll be honest with you guys. I've never heard of Saigon before and thought it was a Vietnamese racial slur when I read her entry title, but turns out, it's not. It's a city. So, what is the big fucking deal here, folks? Well, you know how Tila is: If someone pisses her off, I mean, really pisses her off, she gets all anal. The more popular you are, the more angrier she'll get. She probably gets turned on.

I don't know, maybe it's just me. But I'm Asian and I don't find anything offensive about this. Had she been called a "gook", it would be a different scenario. However, this is a fucking internet. People will exercise their freedom of speech and I'm sure all of us had been called really nasty names (and still do), and if their insults really get to you instead of just shrug it off and move on, well, perhaps you should stay off the internet then?

Christ, almighty! Why is it that this damsel in distress whore always feel compelled to call upon her TilaArmy to help her out? She acts all gangsta and brags about being tough and don't let anyone "fuck with Tila Tequila" and wow! Calls children for help? This is beyond pathetic, this is fucking embarrassing!

Thursday, September 9, 2010

3 Roast Grandma Tila Tequila!

Fuck positive energy!

I don't know what made Tila blog such another insipid pointless entry, but apparently, she's in a mood to get her ass beaten...again, and well, many of the haters were more than happy to oblige. Looks like it's that time of the month again where she needs to do something to draw in traffic! God, what a fucking loser!



1 Pedo Alert!

Keep in mind Tila's fanbase consists of horny little boys and soon-to-be-sluts little girls.

Oh, Tila. Tsk, tsk, tsk. I hope you understand the possible consequences of getting yourself into trouble by exposing yourself to minors.



Wednesday, September 8, 2010

0 Kid Rock? He Has Better Hoes To Hang Out With

Last night, Titla Bacteria was all excited about uploading videos of her awesome appearance at a trashy new strip club in Las Vegas. I'm pretty sure all her children fans were jumping with joy and couldn't wait to see them. However, if any of them had brains whatsoever, they've already did. I love how Tila states her ff (fake and failed) celebrity gossip blog's motto is bringing us legit news, real time. *snorts*



Monday, September 6, 2010

3 Larry Flynt's Hustler Club and Money!

First off, thanks to the fellow posters at Tilasrotspot, Joann and Michelle, for providing us these links!






10 Retweet: Liar Liar

LYING - How do you keep your naive platform from leaving you? Even if you're infamous and is failing at everything, your worst fear is losing them. So, what do you do? Well shit, if they're children and dumb, you might as well fool them. After all, Tila even says she has the world fooled. With all these tweets I've collected, it's no wonder how Grandma Tila was successful of seducing the children with her superficial charm (her primary weapon) and earned their trust and loyalty.

Saturday, September 4, 2010

1 Retweet: Tila In Wonderland

Tila In Wonderland - I wonder if Tila believes her own bullshit. Yes? No? I've forgotten how batshit crazy her tweets were! WARNING! The following collection contains a lot of bullshit escaping Grandma Tila's narcissistic mouth!

0 Retweet: TilaArmy Waiting & Wating

TILAARMY WAITING - Exactly what it means. When you have fools under your control, who wouldn't want to mess around with them? By the way, she actually made them wait until midnight for a surprise. It's at the bottom. You don't want to miss it, either!

0 Retweet: Bossy Lady & Her Cult

BOSSY LADY - She is an ungrateful maggot who deserved getting beaten by her own ex-convict father. Too bad she didn't suffer the same fate as Casey Johnson, though. *sigh* This category consists of Tila telling TilaArmy what to do, pretty much similar to Begging for Help.

0 ReTweet: Pussy, Hypocrisy, and Selling Tweets!

PUSSY - Hmmmm...is this something you should be telling to your underage fans? Anyways, I'm wondering if she's reliving the dream of being in bed with two other girls. Courtesy photo by Ghost Rider Radio.

0 ReTweet: Parenting Advice & Child Lovin'

Someone posted this hilarious comment a while back and it said, "well, if God has blessed you so many time, then why do your babies keep dying? Maybe it's a sign He doesn't want you raising a child!"

PARENTING ADVICE - Yes, it's true. Even though this disgusting ugly whore who never raised a child, was kind enough to share some of her so-called wisdom!

0 ReTweet: Begging, Blaming TilaArmy, & Funny

Why is it that Tila managed to gear up so many followers on Myspace but failed to do the same on Twitter? Perhaps she likely cheated or created endless profiles (wait, isn't that also cheating?). After all, she did boast about not sleeping twenty-four hours straight. So, I was going through her old twitter account, like I did previously with her old blog site and found hilarious tweets.

Tuesday, August 31, 2010

5 Everyone, meet Ti-Lun!

The real purpose of her entry is to remind idiotic children (fans) and intelligent people (haters) her birthday is approaching! Why else would she write her full birth date when it's getting close? If you think about it, writing your full birth date in this entry doesn't make any sense. So, this is just a failed clever method Tila hoping the world will shower her with gifts. After all, she did reminded her fans she still has her fanclub address and tweeted about it because, we all know, Tila is a one sick greedy money-fame-hungry whore and was asking fans to buy her gifts after going through the Juggalos ordeal!

Saturday, August 28, 2010

3 Oh, Tila, Your Past is Catching Up With You

I was digitally going through Tila's old garbage blog and oh, boy, did I find some interesting things I'm sure Tila would regret of saying in the first place!



Friday, August 27, 2010

0 Tila, an Idiotic Androgynous Whore

I agree with many people: How could Tila was able to spell that word right and can't distinguish between their and there? I guess I have to give her a slight credit for trying to sound smart. However, there is a little problem here. My favorite writer, Fatty McFatterson, of the Tilasrotspot, nailed it and wrote it better than I would:

Wednesday, August 25, 2010

5 Tila's History of Porn and Myspace

So, I went over to the lovely Tilasrotspot today (like I do everyday) and apparently, an entry written by Ghost Rider Radio caught their attention and now mine, too. This is certainly a must read. It's a shame we have no evidence to prove it, though. But despite the lack of proof, a follower, Joann, of trs, made a good point:

Monday, August 23, 2010

4 Major OMG Revamping!

Whore removed the Thumbs Up/Down feature! Hahahaha! Couldn't handle the truth apparently!

In honor of Titla's newest scheme to hide her failed attempt at blogging celebrity gossip news, I would like to gather screenshots of what her expectations were and its lies she spewed to get the ignorant masses out there excited of expectations that never was to be fulfilled or accomplished: (If you don't want to read the screenshots, I've narrowed down a list of what we were expected to see. Just scroll down):

Thursday, August 19, 2010

0 Promoting Love, but I'll Slit Your Throat Regardless!

A quick heads up for those who don't know: People discovered if you go to Tila Tequila's Records website, you'll find a rather ironic amusing ad of get a free burrito and that's all there is! Well, I didn't bother to click the ENTER button. Fuck, no! So, I decided to mock Tila and here's this stupid, but still silly result:

Tuesday, August 17, 2010

0 Tila Has a New OMG Staff Writer!!!

Tila wants to impress the world her fake shitty celebrity gossip site is legit and lives up to its name and announces she has hired a new writer. The process took her weeks to finally make the decision like it took her four fucking days to decide which color of the Lambo she wanted as she claims. Let's recap again. Back in April of this year, Tila had a brief, but yet, boring interview with FoxBusiness. You can clearly hear her answer the question of how many employees working for her: 25-30. Yes, it was back in April, but that's not ancient. Anyways, I was shaking my head as I read her entry.

0 The Mosted Hated Skank Dissing the White Race

I have a terrible feeling Tila's going to be mouthing off about her latest ordeal for months, if not, years. It has been proven that the world truly hates this woman and should be labeled as the "most hated skank" in the world. Congrats, bitch! All this media attention should help your lesbian porn become a success!

1 Miss Tila Feels Sorry For Herself

As if she couldn't just let it go and move the fuck on, instead yaps her annoying lip-smacking mouth and demand sympathy. Not getting from me, that's for damn sure!

Monday, August 16, 2010

16 After Beating, I Wear My Big Black Sunglasses!

UPDATE AT THE BOTTOM!

Let's go back in time, specifically, September 2009!



Remember how Tila accused Shawne Merriman of beating her ass up? Well, afterwards, Tila had the nerve to phone TMZ for a quick interview.

Saturday, August 14, 2010

5 Gathering of The Juggalos

NEW UPDATE! THE FUCKING TRUTH!!:


Friday, August 13, 2010

2 Meet the New TilaArmy Soldier! Guess Who?!

In my previous post, Tila's latest member is accused of using a fake photo and that inspired me to create this: ENJOY!

Thursday, August 12, 2010

7 Wow! TilaArmy using fake photos too?!

Wow, fucking seriously! I'm like, surprised that TilaArmy would sink low as Tila herself! But hey, there's that saying: A bird of a feather flocks together!



Tuesday, August 10, 2010

0 Come Lie Down Next to Me And Update On Porn Film

Almost a day ago, Tila tweeted this:

Children, this is how drugged-up junkies think! Don't be fooled!

Breaking news: On August 4th, RadarOnline disclosed Tila's latest project of filming a porn movie. Tila denies this, obviously threatening to sue anyone of publishing her sex tape. What she fails to realize is RadarOnline never mentioned about her sex tape in the first place. They were talking about her upcoming adult film! So, thanks to a fellow twitter user for sharing us a link from RadarOnline:

Monday, August 9, 2010

5 Return To Innocence...Yeah, Right.

I'm wondering: Did Tila Tequila watched Enigma's music video or something?




Sunday, August 8, 2010

1 Parody Book: #1

Well, here it is, folks! We can all dwell on Tila's new book in progress! Tell me what you think! Love it? Or hate it?

Saturday, August 7, 2010

0 Mumbo Jumbo and Other Crap

Why does Tila Tequila need to remind us once a while she's allergic to alcohol? Is she really? Is she really a lesbian? Does she really have friends? Is she really born in 75 instead of 81? My answer: Who the fuck cares? Stupid little Titla wanted to impress her TilaArmy of drinking Vodka, a dare by Mr. Bradshaw himself:

Friday, August 6, 2010

0 Sex, Drugs, and My Lambo: The Life After She Cried Wolf!

So, Tila have tweeted about writing a new book (probably an updated version of Hooking Up with Tila Tequila) and won't be out until next year. Next year? Why wait? I have my sources and was able to obtain the art cover of it! .....not, really. Sorry, folks. I'm just kidding. Actually, to celebrate Tila's upcoming new book (hope the whore's not lying!), I've decided to make a parody of it!

Wednesday, August 4, 2010

0 Tila Denies of Shooting Porn!

WARNING: EXPLICIT ENTRY!

So, we got few words from Miss Titla, obviously (or pretending to be) pissed off! After all, she believes no publicity is bad publicity. So, what's she riled up for? It's getting her the attention she wants! Anyways, here's her lovely message to RadarOnline!

0 Tila Tequila doing Porn?!!!!!

Thanks to The Tila Truth for this breaking news! According to RadarOnline, Tila Tequila was able to buy that Lambo car after all from the advanced payment given by a porn industry!

3 Car, Book, Mansion, Drugs, Charity, PETA, Life, Oh My!

So, Tila is on some vacation, mainly to hug and kiss trees, she's required visitors to register in order to leave comments. But, don't worry folks. Chances are, it'll be uplifted once the tyrannical boss returns. This is just a safe mesaure to make sure her TilaArmy (what's left of it) don't read comments regarding about her prostitution UK tour trip. *winks* Okay. I'll start with the car first. So, while Tila claims she now owns a Lambo, the website states otherwise. Maybe the store have quantities of the same brand and model instead of just one? The website has their address. For someone who lives in that area, go to that store, say you're a relative of some unknown wealthy person and saw Tila posing with the car on TMZ and is interested in purchasing that particular vehicle and see what the staffs have to say.

Monday, August 2, 2010

8 Desperate for Attention!

It's great that Tilasrotspot is re-opened to the public! YES! Go there to get the best Tila gossip news there! Clearly, the rotspot's notice says it's an invite to read only, but for someone, like Tila, thought otherwise, all too-hyped, and wrote these messages that will be used against her:

Saturday, July 31, 2010

1 Laurence Fishburne's Daughter Aims for Porn

This is the kind of shit I'm talking about. Although there's no Tila Tequila sex tape out there (and we would like to keep it that way), but this is like, every parents' worst nightmare.

Friday, July 30, 2010

1 I Only Care about Fame and will Corrupt Anyone To Get It!

Hmmmm...didn't we all predict Tila will not discuss about her Lambo car after completing the necessary paperwork? Well, she's been quiet about it. It took Tila four days to decide which color she wanted? I smell famewhore all right, waiting for media to talk about her latest antics.

Last night, our little mogul wanna-be-aspiring friend can't get enough of archiving old pictures of herself, a tactic she's hoping to attract more media attention...more children, and more perverts along the way. Hey, it comes with the territory, right? Well, it's not working, so, she's willing to cross the line with these latest posts:

0 Thought of the Day: 07/30/2010

Thanks to a fellow poster for the link from Miss Titty's website.

Dear Tila, when are you going to get new breast implants? Is your right boob named Jane, and your left, Caroline?

4 Car, New Book, and Latest TilaArmy Expolitation


Does anyone actually believes this shit? ......Neither do I. Moving on.

Okay, four days isn't a lie, but purchasing? Why should I tell you? It's my business and don't need to prove anyone I have money! *pause* Oh, wait, I am trying to prove the skeptics I have dough! Never mind! So, Tila posts a new entry (abusing the privilege of running a celebrity gossip site and constantly make it all about her, forgetting its true purpose) about finally bought a 2010 Lamborghini Gallardo LP560-4 Coupe (snickers, yeah right!). PLEASE NOTE: I know nothing about cars, so if the car type is wrong, let me know, otherwise, continue reading. [UPDATE 08/04/2010 - The correct model is 2009 Lamborghini Gallardo LP 560-4] Why did Titla Bacteria wrote Lambo costs $1.7 million, dollars when in fact, they're not? It's under $300,000 according to these sites: [1], [2], [3], [4]. Fortunately, Tila does mention the more accurate price eventually. Perhaps if she got all the options, the total would cost around $1.7 million dollars? I doubt that. Anyways, let's revisit the tweets, shall we?

Wednesday, July 28, 2010

4 Someone Pass me a Fucking Tissue!

UPDATE AT THE BOTTOM PAGE!!!!

Hey, I did a new photoshop manipulation! Hope you guys like it. I did this yesterday and is too lazy to change the quote. "How the fuck do I get out of here?!" is actually funnier. Anyways, enjoy!

1 Thought of the Day 07/28/2010

I've decided to make a new label called "Thought of the Day", which is inspired by our favorite mogul-wanna-be-aspiring friend's own Thought of the Day on her shitty fake celebrity gossip blog/site, except mine is better and makes sense. My objective for this label is be very brief and to the point. So, here's my first one.

Monday, July 26, 2010

6 Gossip Shite, Stalkers, Car Update, and PETA Campaign?

Previously, Tila mentioned from one of her latest entries regarding about respecting opinions from people. Unfortunately, there is no truth in this and our sentiments will looked upon with disdain, unless we're kissing her disgusting ass. Take these for examples:

3 Tila's Paparazzi!

Ever since Tila did an interview with some schmuck back in London, it really inspired me to investigate Tila's paparazzi. This clip is a must see with lots of chuckles regarding about paparazzi allegedly working for her. You should read the I Fucked the UK! entry when you get a chance. It's really sad.

0 Oh, Shit! Drivers, Watch Out!!!!!

This coming week, our favorite mogul-wanna-aspiring mogul states she's getting a new car!

Sunday, July 25, 2010

0 More Lindsay and Tila does not Respect Your Opinion.

Still, this cunt can't get over the fact Lindsay Lohan continues to ignore her. What's a girl got to do to get Lindsay's attention? ........BLOG and make it sound like you knew and chatted with her!