Tuesday, August 31, 2010

5 Everyone, meet Ti-Lun!

The real purpose of her entry is to remind idiotic children (fans) and intelligent people (haters) her birthday is approaching! Why else would she write her full birth date when it's getting close? If you think about it, writing your full birth date in this entry doesn't make any sense. So, this is just a failed clever method Tila hoping the world will shower her with gifts. After all, she did reminded her fans she still has her fanclub address and tweeted about it because, we all know, Tila is a one sick greedy money-fame-hungry whore and was asking fans to buy her gifts after going through the Juggalos ordeal!

Saturday, August 28, 2010

3 Oh, Tila, Your Past is Catching Up With You

I was digitally going through Tila's old garbage blog and oh, boy, did I find some interesting things I'm sure Tila would regret of saying in the first place!

Friday, August 27, 2010

0 Tila, an Idiotic Androgynous Whore

I agree with many people: How could Tila was able to spell that word right and can't distinguish between their and there? I guess I have to give her a slight credit for trying to sound smart. However, there is a little problem here. My favorite writer, Fatty McFatterson, of the Tilasrotspot, nailed it and wrote it better than I would:

Wednesday, August 25, 2010

5 Tila's History of Porn and Myspace

So, I went over to the lovely Tilasrotspot today (like I do everyday) and apparently, an entry written by Ghost Rider Radio caught their attention and now mine, too. This is certainly a must read. It's a shame we have no evidence to prove it, though. But despite the lack of proof, a follower, Joann, of trs, made a good point:

Monday, August 23, 2010

4 Major OMG Revamping!

Whore removed the Thumbs Up/Down feature! Hahahaha! Couldn't handle the truth apparently!

In honor of Titla's newest scheme to hide her failed attempt at blogging celebrity gossip news, I would like to gather screenshots of what her expectations were and its lies she spewed to get the ignorant masses out there excited of expectations that never was to be fulfilled or accomplished: (If you don't want to read the screenshots, I've narrowed down a list of what we were expected to see. Just scroll down):

Thursday, August 19, 2010

0 Promoting Love, but I'll Slit Your Throat Regardless!

A quick heads up for those who don't know: People discovered if you go to Tila Tequila's Records website, you'll find a rather ironic amusing ad of get a free burrito and that's all there is! Well, I didn't bother to click the ENTER button. Fuck, no! So, I decided to mock Tila and here's this stupid, but still silly result:

Tuesday, August 17, 2010

0 Tila Has a New OMG Staff Writer!!!

Tila wants to impress the world her fake shitty celebrity gossip site is legit and lives up to its name and announces she has hired a new writer. The process took her weeks to finally make the decision like it took her four fucking days to decide which color of the Lambo she wanted as she claims. Let's recap again. Back in April of this year, Tila had a brief, but yet, boring interview with FoxBusiness. You can clearly hear her answer the question of how many employees working for her: 25-30. Yes, it was back in April, but that's not ancient. Anyways, I was shaking my head as I read her entry.

0 The Mosted Hated Skank Dissing the White Race

I have a terrible feeling Tila's going to be mouthing off about her latest ordeal for months, if not, years. It has been proven that the world truly hates this woman and should be labeled as the "most hated skank" in the world. Congrats, bitch! All this media attention should help your lesbian porn become a success!

1 Miss Tila Feels Sorry For Herself

As if she couldn't just let it go and move the fuck on, instead yaps her annoying lip-smacking mouth and demand sympathy. Not getting from me, that's for damn sure!

Monday, August 16, 2010

16 After Beating, I Wear My Big Black Sunglasses!


Let's go back in time, specifically, September 2009!

Remember how Tila accused Shawne Merriman of beating her ass up? Well, afterwards, Tila had the nerve to phone TMZ for a quick interview.

Saturday, August 14, 2010

5 Gathering of The Juggalos


Friday, August 13, 2010

2 Meet the New TilaArmy Soldier! Guess Who?!

In my previous post, Tila's latest member is accused of using a fake photo and that inspired me to create this: ENJOY!

Thursday, August 12, 2010

7 Wow! TilaArmy using fake photos too?!

Wow, fucking seriously! I'm like, surprised that TilaArmy would sink low as Tila herself! But hey, there's that saying: A bird of a feather flocks together!

Tuesday, August 10, 2010

0 Come Lie Down Next to Me And Update On Porn Film

Almost a day ago, Tila tweeted this:

Children, this is how drugged-up junkies think! Don't be fooled!

Breaking news: On August 4th, RadarOnline disclosed Tila's latest project of filming a porn movie. Tila denies this, obviously threatening to sue anyone of publishing her sex tape. What she fails to realize is RadarOnline never mentioned about her sex tape in the first place. They were talking about her upcoming adult film! So, thanks to a fellow twitter user for sharing us a link from RadarOnline:

Monday, August 9, 2010

5 Return To Innocence...Yeah, Right.

I'm wondering: Did Tila Tequila watched Enigma's music video or something?

Sunday, August 8, 2010

1 Parody Book: #1

Well, here it is, folks! We can all dwell on Tila's new book in progress! Tell me what you think! Love it? Or hate it?

Saturday, August 7, 2010

0 Mumbo Jumbo and Other Crap

Why does Tila Tequila need to remind us once a while she's allergic to alcohol? Is she really? Is she really a lesbian? Does she really have friends? Is she really born in 75 instead of 81? My answer: Who the fuck cares? Stupid little Titla wanted to impress her TilaArmy of drinking Vodka, a dare by Mr. Bradshaw himself:

Friday, August 6, 2010

0 Sex, Drugs, and My Lambo: The Life After She Cried Wolf!

So, Tila have tweeted about writing a new book (probably an updated version of Hooking Up with Tila Tequila) and won't be out until next year. Next year? Why wait? I have my sources and was able to obtain the art cover of it! .....not, really. Sorry, folks. I'm just kidding. Actually, to celebrate Tila's upcoming new book (hope the whore's not lying!), I've decided to make a parody of it!

Wednesday, August 4, 2010

0 Tila Denies of Shooting Porn!


So, we got few words from Miss Titla, obviously (or pretending to be) pissed off! After all, she believes no publicity is bad publicity. So, what's she riled up for? It's getting her the attention she wants! Anyways, here's her lovely message to RadarOnline!

0 Tila Tequila doing Porn?!!!!!

Thanks to The Tila Truth for this breaking news! According to RadarOnline, Tila Tequila was able to buy that Lambo car after all from the advanced payment given by a porn industry!

3 Car, Book, Mansion, Drugs, Charity, PETA, Life, Oh My!

So, Tila is on some vacation, mainly to hug and kiss trees, she's required visitors to register in order to leave comments. But, don't worry folks. Chances are, it'll be uplifted once the tyrannical boss returns. This is just a safe mesaure to make sure her TilaArmy (what's left of it) don't read comments regarding about her prostitution UK tour trip. *winks* Okay. I'll start with the car first. So, while Tila claims she now owns a Lambo, the website states otherwise. Maybe the store have quantities of the same brand and model instead of just one? The website has their address. For someone who lives in that area, go to that store, say you're a relative of some unknown wealthy person and saw Tila posing with the car on TMZ and is interested in purchasing that particular vehicle and see what the staffs have to say.

Monday, August 2, 2010

8 Desperate for Attention!

It's great that Tilasrotspot is re-opened to the public! YES! Go there to get the best Tila gossip news there! Clearly, the rotspot's notice says it's an invite to read only, but for someone, like Tila, thought otherwise, all too-hyped, and wrote these messages that will be used against her: